Barrymore's television comeback

Today has been a very interesting day:

Firstly, I have discovered that it would cost £4.58 to post my hand to London.

Secondly, 'Tina' (not her real name) at Greggs in Shipley didn't know what an iced finger without the icing is called...nor did she want to know.

Thirdly, it costs £3995 to be a plumber and takes 400 hours...I'm sure I could do it in about 5 hours, as your average plumber doesn't come across as being intellectually gifted, unless that figure is based on an exceptionally intelligent candidate...in which case if I start the course tomorrow I should be qualified by the time Michael Barrymore makes his television comeback.